february 27, 2011
i spent a lot of the past week mad at the world. why do bad things happen to good people? shouldn't people that are good to others get some kind of pass and fate be nice to them? that is my crazy theory and sadly it keeps getting proven wrong.
i found out last weekend that a family that was tremendously helpful to my family through our struggle was hit again with one of their own. they are really good people and have already been through so much, so i was shocked and really mad that this could happen. they are of course making the best of it, but i couldn't accept it.
you know when you're nicely making a big tower of teetering blocks? well i felt like i was doing that and with this news they all came smashing to the ground. the stuff that talyn and i have gone through, then more recently my bf's family and now this. how can life be so cruel?
if you sit back and really look at everything going on, it feels like there is so much bad. is it that i'm getting older, that i'm finally paying attention or is there just more bad? if there is some mastermind behind this world and what goes on, are they trying to make us stop and take notice? notice of how disconnected people have become, how people are more lonely, how we all go home to our houses every night and lock our doors for the night?
maybe they are making a bold statement to try and pull us all together. the one thing i have learned is through the bad, through the tragedies that happen, people come together. that is the good in it all. so try and keep your focus on that.
love to you all,
tasha
Sunday
your kid is spoiled
february 20, 2011
getting ready to enjoy a very "out of character" low key weekend, we ordered a pizza on friday night. talyn had just finished a play date at our house and so there were toys laid around. when the delivery guy walked in, he looked at our front play room and said "wow...how many kids do you have?". i answered "only one" and then he said "look at all the toys, your kid is spoiled".
first instinct.....slam the door in his face. what did i do? smile politely and explain that he's the only grandchild on my side, so he is lucky to get lots of toys. protective mommy instincts then wanted to go into the "and he lost his dad a year ago and i've had cancer, so he's kind of had a hard life for a 5 year old". but i didn't. kept smiling politely.
after he left, it was really sticking with me. spoiled? but then i looked at the play room and saw the mess that it really was in. there were toys everywhere and lots of them.
so today we spent the day going through all of his stuff. piles for broken stuff, not used stuff and stuff he's grown out of. my right arm is getting really strong!
i've also had some semi-stressful planning stuff going on and my usual - run it all out, doesn't work with a broken wrist. so this was actually quite therapeutic.
tonight i feel proud looking at the still large amount of toys, organized nicely. and like i got some "stuff" out doing it.
and i also feel like this is the start of a major upheaval of my house. time to really go through stuff and purge. what good re-creation plan can really happen when you feel like you're drowning in stuff everywhere?
step one has to be "purge and organize"...at least for me.
but i think talyn is probably still a little bit spoiled.
happy long weekend!
tasha
getting ready to enjoy a very "out of character" low key weekend, we ordered a pizza on friday night. talyn had just finished a play date at our house and so there were toys laid around. when the delivery guy walked in, he looked at our front play room and said "wow...how many kids do you have?". i answered "only one" and then he said "look at all the toys, your kid is spoiled".
first instinct.....slam the door in his face. what did i do? smile politely and explain that he's the only grandchild on my side, so he is lucky to get lots of toys. protective mommy instincts then wanted to go into the "and he lost his dad a year ago and i've had cancer, so he's kind of had a hard life for a 5 year old". but i didn't. kept smiling politely.
after he left, it was really sticking with me. spoiled? but then i looked at the play room and saw the mess that it really was in. there were toys everywhere and lots of them.
so today we spent the day going through all of his stuff. piles for broken stuff, not used stuff and stuff he's grown out of. my right arm is getting really strong!
i've also had some semi-stressful planning stuff going on and my usual - run it all out, doesn't work with a broken wrist. so this was actually quite therapeutic.
tonight i feel proud looking at the still large amount of toys, organized nicely. and like i got some "stuff" out doing it.
and i also feel like this is the start of a major upheaval of my house. time to really go through stuff and purge. what good re-creation plan can really happen when you feel like you're drowning in stuff everywhere?
step one has to be "purge and organize"...at least for me.
but i think talyn is probably still a little bit spoiled.
happy long weekend!
tasha
Friday
more learnings
february 18, 2011
1. pillowcases are really hard to put on with 1 arm.
2. when something is taken away, you might want it more.
3. i get nothing done without a plan.
ok so the first one is really self explanatory - no? but stick with me on #2.
we have all heard that any new habit takes 30 days to take hold. so if i want to exercise more often, i have to stick to a certain schedule for 30 days and then it should stick.
but when i "have" to do something, i usually don't want to. and if I "can't" do something, i usually want to do it even more.
so i had this theory when i started this project that if i couldn't do something i wanted to, i would take it away for 30 days and then i would want it more. think about it, if you are told you can't have "X"....you want it more.
now with my wrist there are some things i want to do that I can't...and guess what? i want to do them all more!
then #3. i have tried this whole - let it happen when it happens approach to my re-creation and yes a few things are happening. i have planned some great things from my life list and am actually really happy again, but overall i am not moving ahead as much as i would like to. so now i know....i am a planner. and that's ok.
let the planning begin!
talk soon,
tash
1. pillowcases are really hard to put on with 1 arm.
2. when something is taken away, you might want it more.
3. i get nothing done without a plan.
ok so the first one is really self explanatory - no? but stick with me on #2.
we have all heard that any new habit takes 30 days to take hold. so if i want to exercise more often, i have to stick to a certain schedule for 30 days and then it should stick.
but when i "have" to do something, i usually don't want to. and if I "can't" do something, i usually want to do it even more.
so i had this theory when i started this project that if i couldn't do something i wanted to, i would take it away for 30 days and then i would want it more. think about it, if you are told you can't have "X"....you want it more.
now with my wrist there are some things i want to do that I can't...and guess what? i want to do them all more!
then #3. i have tried this whole - let it happen when it happens approach to my re-creation and yes a few things are happening. i have planned some great things from my life list and am actually really happy again, but overall i am not moving ahead as much as i would like to. so now i know....i am a planner. and that's ok.
let the planning begin!
talk soon,
tash
Saturday
good luck charms accepted
february 12, 2011
the day after my last posting, while out living life and snowboarding, i fell backwards. there was nothing special about this fall. it wasn't harder or faster than others i had had. but can you guess how this story ends? a broken wrist. the break itself was a bit special because the bone moved, so the last week has been a bit trying.
the first day i spent in a funk. on the outside maybe not so, but inside i was mad. just when life was moving along nicely, another obstacle in my way. and the fact that i so bravely and stupidly declined any pain meds wasn't working for me.
now almost a week after the break, i am adjusting to one armed life. but let me just vent about some of the biggest problems:
cntrl-alt-del....really? why so far apart? unlocking my laptop has been interesting
opening any jars, peeling any produce and really any cutting. can you say instant meals?
the amount of time to do anything at least triples. we've been running late all week!
what that has made me do is SLOW down. even this post is taking forever. and accept that things will get done when they get done. maybe some lessons i needed to learn as a part of my re-creation plan?
a week later i am determined to move ahead with one arm! nothing is going to stop me. not even this pretty blue cast.
ciao!
tasha
the day after my last posting, while out living life and snowboarding, i fell backwards. there was nothing special about this fall. it wasn't harder or faster than others i had had. but can you guess how this story ends? a broken wrist. the break itself was a bit special because the bone moved, so the last week has been a bit trying.
the first day i spent in a funk. on the outside maybe not so, but inside i was mad. just when life was moving along nicely, another obstacle in my way. and the fact that i so bravely and stupidly declined any pain meds wasn't working for me.
now almost a week after the break, i am adjusting to one armed life. but let me just vent about some of the biggest problems:
cntrl-alt-del....really? why so far apart? unlocking my laptop has been interesting
opening any jars, peeling any produce and really any cutting. can you say instant meals?
the amount of time to do anything at least triples. we've been running late all week!
what that has made me do is SLOW down. even this post is taking forever. and accept that things will get done when they get done. maybe some lessons i needed to learn as a part of my re-creation plan?
a week later i am determined to move ahead with one arm! nothing is going to stop me. not even this pretty blue cast.
ciao!
tasha
finally some motivation
february 5, 2011
i started off the year all motivated to do this big list of things and really haven't felt like doing any of it. i don't know what happened. was i really not ready to move on? that was definitely what was going through my mind. but how do i really figure that out?
shortly after my last posting, a close family friend passed away. a result of a tragic accident that happened in early december. the last week i've been trying to help the family (my bff Jill's family) get through this and travelled to attend the celebration. i was worried about this triggering talyn and then didn't know if it would have the same affect on me.
the celebration of life for rob was nothing short of inspiring. which is a weird thing to say isn't it? hard to describe, but the energy in the room was incredible. there were about 1500 people, all wearing their favorite sports jerseys, there was loud music, hilarious stories, tears and tons of laughter. although it's a terrible thing that happened, it just amazes me how it brings people together.
helping his now widow walk through the days has many similarities to my life almost a year ago. but instead of it making me sad, it makes me feel purpose again. talyn too wanted to talk to his youngest son and give him some advice on what to do to get happy again. it's hard to ever think anything happens for a reason, but taking the good out of something bad is all we can really do.
coming home i finally feel a push to start to get things done again. tonight i cleaned out my pantry. small steps people! that pantry hadn't been cleaned out for over a year. and now i'm starting to think about what else i can start to purge from my past to give more room for my future. it doesn't mean i'll ever forget those things or memories, just time to create new ones as well and make some room in my life for them.
cheers to new beginnings and much love to my second family as they get through the next while.
talk soon,
tasha
i started off the year all motivated to do this big list of things and really haven't felt like doing any of it. i don't know what happened. was i really not ready to move on? that was definitely what was going through my mind. but how do i really figure that out?
shortly after my last posting, a close family friend passed away. a result of a tragic accident that happened in early december. the last week i've been trying to help the family (my bff Jill's family) get through this and travelled to attend the celebration. i was worried about this triggering talyn and then didn't know if it would have the same affect on me.
the celebration of life for rob was nothing short of inspiring. which is a weird thing to say isn't it? hard to describe, but the energy in the room was incredible. there were about 1500 people, all wearing their favorite sports jerseys, there was loud music, hilarious stories, tears and tons of laughter. although it's a terrible thing that happened, it just amazes me how it brings people together.
helping his now widow walk through the days has many similarities to my life almost a year ago. but instead of it making me sad, it makes me feel purpose again. talyn too wanted to talk to his youngest son and give him some advice on what to do to get happy again. it's hard to ever think anything happens for a reason, but taking the good out of something bad is all we can really do.
coming home i finally feel a push to start to get things done again. tonight i cleaned out my pantry. small steps people! that pantry hadn't been cleaned out for over a year. and now i'm starting to think about what else i can start to purge from my past to give more room for my future. it doesn't mean i'll ever forget those things or memories, just time to create new ones as well and make some room in my life for them.
cheers to new beginnings and much love to my second family as they get through the next while.
talk soon,
tasha
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)